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How to Control Anger in a Healthy Way

October 5th, 2024

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Anger is a natural human emotion, but when it's not managed effectively, it can be harmful to our mental health and physical self. Learning how to control anger in a healthy way is essential for maintaining strong relationships with yourself and with others. Let’s explore effective strategies for anger management and preventing anger from escalating into destructive behaviors. Keep reading to learn more!

What is Anger?

Anger is a powerful, universal emotion. To manage our anger we need to understand it and realize how it can affect others and ourselves. On a biological level, anger has evolved as a way of surviving and protecting ourselves from something harmful or unjust. Our bodies might experience some anger when basic human needs such as food, shelter, sex, or sleep are unmet.

Anger can trigger physiological changes and kick in the fight or flight response in our central nervous system. We can notice increases in heart rate and palpitations, blood pressure and hormones like adrenaline and muscle tension.

We may also feel angry in reaction to someone's judgment, criticism or actions. However, when our anger impairs our ability to communicate well and we say or do hurtful or irrational things we must step in to learn how to deal with anger in a healthy way.

How To Deal With Anger

Below are several ways you can reduce your anger or respond to your anger in a more productive way:

  • Take slow deep breaths: You can use counting to help shift your focus and attention to your body. Breathing will help slow down hyper-arousal in the body.
  • Slow down: Be mindful and curious about what is making you angry. Notice what words and tone you are choosing in your responses. Take some time to think before you act or speak so that you do not lash out.
  • Relaxation techniques: Body scan meditation can help you identify and validate parts of you that are holding tension and anger. This can feel like warmth, tightness, agitation, or clenching. Muscle relaxation can also help release this energy.
  • Exercise: Working out has been proved to help increase feel good hormones like endorphins and can be a great way to release energy in a healthy way.
  • Use "I" Statements: When discussing what upset you, use "I" statements to express your feelings rather than placing blame. For example, say, "I feel upset when..." instead of "You make me angry when...". This approach helps communicate your emotions without escalating the conflict.
  • Practice Self-Compassion: Acknowledge that anger is a natural human emotion, and it’s okay to feel it. Instead of criticizing yourself for feeling angry, practice self-compassion. Remind yourself that you are working on understanding and managing your emotions in a healthier way.
  • Take a break: When you feel yourself getting angry, take a break from the situation. Go for a walk, listen to music, or practice deep breathing.

It is useful to understand the underlying causes of why you are feeling angry so that the problems are acknowledged. Talk to a mental health professional if your anger brings up memories or emotions that feel overwhelming or unmanageable. Meeting with a therapist and keeping a journal can help you identify your triggers.

Understanding Our Anger

Anger is a natural and often necessary emotion that serves an important function in our lives. It can signal that something is wrong, highlight unmet needs, or indicate when our boundaries have been crossed. However, while anger itself is not inherently bad, how we choose to express it can make a significant difference. Understanding the origins and triggers of our anger is key to managing it effectively.

What Emotion is Behind Anger?

Anger can stem from a variety of sources, including frustration, stress, feeling hurt, or experiencing a perceived injustice. Sometimes, it might also mask other emotions like sadness, fear, or insecurity. By exploring the root cause of your anger, you can gain insights into your emotional state and identify patterns or underlying issues that need attention.

Recognizing that anger is often a surface emotion can be enlightening. For example, feeling anger over a minor annoyance might actually be linked to deeper feelings of insecurity or past experiences. Understanding your anger helps you navigate it more effectively and respond in healthier, more constructive ways.

Therapy and Anger Management Classes

Seeking professional support through therapy or anger management classes can be incredibly beneficial for those struggling to control their anger. These resources provide a safe and structured environment to explore the root causes of your anger, understand your triggers, and develop effective strategies for managing intense emotions.

Working with a therapist can help you identify and address the underlying emotions driving your anger. Therapists often use techniques like cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) to teach you how to reframe negative thought patterns that contribute to anger.

Through therapy, you can also learn new coping skills, such as relaxation techniques, problem-solving strategies, and communication skills to express your needs more effectively.

Choose a therapist who specializes in anger management and can give you therapy sessions specifically designed to provide tools and techniques for managing anger in everyday situations.

These sessions often cover topics like recognizing anger triggers, understanding the physiological responses to anger, and learning coping mechanisms to diffuse anger before it escalates.

In therapy you are encouraged to share your experiences and practice new skills in a supportive and safe setting, ultimately leading to improved emotional well-being and more positive interactions with others.

Find a Therapist Near You!

If you are looking for a therapist near you for anger management, Clarity Clinic can help! At Clarity, you can pick from a wide range of qualified therapists in Chicago, each specializing in different areas like anger management. Apart from psychotherapy, we also offer group therapy, and PHP/IOP programs.

Head to one of our clinics in the Loop, River North, Lakeview Belmont, or Lakeview Broadway for the best therapy in Chicago. If you live in the suburbs such as Oakbrook, Northbrook, Schaumburg, Winnetka, or Naperville, IL, head to our Evanston or Arlington Heights clinic. Can’t make it in person? No worries, we offer online therapy that takes insurance to ensure you can get the mental health care you need from the comfort of your home.

What are you waiting for? Find therapy near you at Clarity Clinic today and take control of your anger!

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